


We All Hurt A Little Sometimes (It's Alright)

by DefaltManifesto



Category: Marvel, Spider-Man (Ultimateverse), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: (sorta) - Freeform, Child Abuse, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, peter whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-16
Updated: 2014-05-02
Packaged: 2018-01-19 15:07:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1474234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DefaltManifesto/pseuds/DefaltManifesto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Flash finds out about Peter's identity. Peter, at Gwen's urging, decides to let him into their two-person club. They quickly learn it's not just about tolerating each other though, and they both start to realize that maybe it's about time they start picking up the broken pieces of their lives.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 2 should be up this weekend at the latest (I hope). The sexual content is going to be pretty much exclusively between Flash/Peter just so you all know. Title taken from Outside by Hollywood Undead.

Peter opened the window, wincing as his ribs protested the action. The cut across his chest splattered blood across the carpet and he groaned, flopping onto his bed. Bloodstains were always so difficult to get out.

"So you really are Spider-man."

Peter flailed his way back upright, head thunking against the wall. Flash was reclined back in Peter's computer chair, wearing baggy sweats and a Midtown High jersey with a smug grin on his face.

"What..." Peter wasn't able to get another word out, the pain in his ribs choking off the rest of the sentence.

"It wasn't that hard to figure out. I'm not as dumb as you all think I am," Flash said. He turned in the chair to reveal Peter's police scanner, extra web-shooters, and his journal of enemies spread out across the desk.

"How'd you get in?"

"What, you think you invented sneaking in through the window?"

Peter felt a variety of things in that moment; anger, a touch of violated, and a bit panicked. The strongest of it all though was annoyance at Flash's stupid expression, so Peter held out a hand and triggered a web-shooter with a lazy flick of his fingers. The grin disappeared under a mass of webbing. Before Flash could move, Peter zapped his arms to the chair and then the wheels to the floor. Then, he tugged off his mask and stood up, biting his lip as the action sent splitting pain up his side.

"You hang tight. I'm going to go make sure I don't bleed out on the floor," Peter said.

He grabbed the remote off his bed and undid the electronic locks on his door before tossing it on the floor and heading for the bathroom. He stripped the suit off and let it crumple on the floor before grabbing a washcloth and soaking it in soap and water. Each stroke of the cloth over the raw wounds made him want to curl up and cry but he did neither of those things. Once they were clean, he tugged on an old pair of gym shorts before taking the first aid kit out of the sink cabinet and heading back to his room.

Peter grabbed a spray bottle of the web-dissolving solution he'd finally gotten around to perfecting from his desk and sprayed Flash in the face with it. He sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled out gauze and athletic tape to start bandaging his wounds.

"So, Flash. You found me out. What're you going to do about it?" Peter asked, too tired for any witty comments.

"Don't really know," Flash said, wiping his mouth off against his shoulders as best he could. "I was going to blackmail you."

"That'd be really stupid," Peter said. "Because I could just leave you here."

"Yeah, I'm realizing that, thanks," Flash said. "But look man, if I found you out, how long until someone else does?"

Peter fumbled with the bandages and dropped them on the ground. He sucked in a tight breath and tried not to make a sound as he bent to pick it up.

"And I mean, now that I know, I can help you," Flash said.

A short laugh forced its way out of his chest, tapering off into a pained groan as his ribs throbbed.

"You? Help me? Yeah, okay," Peter said.

"I know how to properly wrap a chest wound," Flash said. "What the hell were you even fighting anyways?"

"Mutant rats. It'll probably be on the news later," Peter said. "Also, I'm not letting you anywhere near me. Gimme one good reason I'd ever trust you after you spent, I don't know, ten years beating the shit out of me."

"You're the stronger one now," Flash said. "Not much I could do to you."

Peter's eyes narrowed. "Okay, that was a surprisingly good point."

He got to his feet and grabbed the spray bottle to dissolve the web holding Flash in place. Flash stood up and took the roll of bandages from him before nudging Peter back towards the bed. Peter sat down on it with his back to Flash, tensing as the other began to wrap the wound.

"Did you bruise your ribs?" Flash asked.

"Yeah. Not broken." Peter kept waiting for his spidey senses to flare and alert him that Flash was finally going to make his move.

It never came though.

Flash tucked the bandage into place after Peter ripped it off the roll and then patted Peter's shoulder. "You're all good, man."

"Didn't realize you were any good at this stuff," Peter said, turning to face him.

Flash sat back down in the computer chair and shrugged. "Well, you know my dad."

That was true. Peter was one of the few people who _did_ know; a case of accidentally overhearing conversations between the principal and secretary when he was getting volunteer hours by being the errand boy. Guilt made Peter's gut tighten.

"Alright, so why do you want to help me now? Bit of a change from beating the shit out of me and wanting blackmail material," Peter said.

"Spider-man is a cool dude. Still trying to reconcile that that makes _you_ a cool guy, but-"

"Oh, reconcile, that's a big word for you," Peter said.

"Shut up, I'm serious," Flash said. "Why's it so bad that I want to help?"

"Because give minutes ago you wanted to blackmail me!" Peter shook his head. "You broke into my room. How the hell am I supposed to just _trust_ you now? Why do you even care?"

Flash grabbed Peter's journal off the desk. "This made me change my mind."

Peter used a web to snag the journal out of Flash's hand before tugging the webshooter off and shoving it and the journal under his pillow. "That's...it's just enemies. Nothing more."

"Anyone who feels the need to gather that much info and rank them from least likey to most likely to kill you needs some help," Flash said. "Your life is fucked up Peter, and you've only got Gwen. You need more than one person."

"Great sentiment, Flash, but I'm not interested." Peter flopped back on the bed, hating the anxious energy that hummed under his skin. He wanted to pace, run, do _something_ to feel less trapped. "Gwen's dad is dead because of me, Flash. So is my uncle. You help me, you get tangled up in all the crap that comes with it. That means you might die too."

"So Gwen's allowed to risk her life but I'm not?" Flash asked.

Peter gave an exaggerated groan and let his arm flop over his eyes. "Gwen knows what she's getting into. And she actually, you know, likes me. Flash, we aren't even friends."

"Then let's be friends."

Peter barked out a laugh, hand dropping to brace across his ribs. "Yeah, okay, let's just forget years of torment and be besties. We can braid each other's hair and talk about boys!"

"That doesn't even-"

"This is a guilt thing, isn't it?" Peter asked. He pushed himself upright, tilting his head to the side when Flash's gaze dropped to the ground. "It _totally_ is. I'm so not playing along with your little redemption story."

"Fine. I get it. I offered." Flash grabbed his bag off the ground and slung it over his shoulder.

Peter didn't try and stop him from leaving.

 

-.-

 

Peter slid his hands through Gwen's hair, watching the way the sunlight reflected off of it. He kept waiting for her beauty to stop captivating him, but he was pretty sure he'd never get sick of looking at her.

"You've got that goofy smile on your face again," Gwen said, her voice jerking him out of his thoughts.

"Sorry." Peter pulled back, glancing around the courtyard. Everyone was too engrossed in their lunch meals to pay him any mind.

Gwen sat her book down and swiveled in her seat to face him. She held one of his hands between two of her own, fingers tracing over the lines on his palm. He was still getting used to the feel of the fishnet armbands she had started to wear, but he didn't mind them. A lot of people talked behind her back about her new look, saying it was just a result of having a meltdown about her dad.

Peter wasn't going to complain about it though. She looked good in black, and he'd be crazy to whine about the fishnets that had gained their own half of one of her drawers. As far as he was concerned, changing things up after what she went through was perfectly fine. After all, his uncle died and he started wearing spandex and fighting crime. Who was he to judge?

"You've seemed a little out of it. Did something happen?" she asked. She raised his hand up to her lips and kissed his knuckles.

"Flash knows now," Peter said. "He broke into my rom and found all my stuff."

Gwen straightened. "Should I go threaten him?"

Peter gave a strained smile. "No, no it's fine. He actually wants to help."

"What did you say?"

"I said no. Mostly because I don't trust him farther than I can throw him, which admittedly actually _is_ pretty far," Peter said. He looked down at his lap. "And because I don't want anyone else dying for me."

Gwen squeezed his hands. "It's up to you. I get that you want to protect him, and me, but you have to let people help you sometimes. You can't make the choice of what people want to risk their lives for."

Guilt twisted in Peter's gut. "How can you say that after everything?"

"My dad was a police officer. He knew what he was getting into."

"But Flash doesn't."

"So tell him. Really explain it, and if he decides to stay then...why should we keep him away?"

Peter couldn't look at her, unable to really refute her reasoning outside _I don't want anyone else to die in my name_. Because really, he couldn't deny Flash the opportunity to redeem himself. Peter had saved a lot of people since his inaction had gotten Uncle Ben killed, but he still hadn't managed to beat back the leftover guilt. If he could spare Flash those feelings, even if they were only on a minor scale, he'd do it.

"Peter?"

The bell rang and Peter jerked back. "Sorry...I'll talk to him again. If he'll let me."

Gwen stole a quick kiss and hugged him tight, thought she was still careful of his aching ribs. He dropped his forehead to her collarbone and took a deep breath before standing up. He took her hand and they headed to class.

 

-.-

 

"Flash. Yo, Flash, wait up!"

Peter hopped onto his skateboard and rolled after the other, catching up before he could reach his bus and swinging in front of him.

"What the hell, Parker?"

"I wanted to talk. We should talk," Peter said. "About what you said yesterday."

"You made your position clear. Now move or I swear to _God_ , I will punch you," Flash said.

"Changed my mind. Let's walk."

Peter hopped off his board and tucked it under his arm. Flash glanced at the bus and then gave an irritated sigh.

"Fine."

Peter led the way, waiting until they were away from students before he began to talk. "Gwen thinks I should trust you. If you want to help, then I guess I shouldn't tell you not to. But we need some ground rules."

Flash didn't look at him, but he didn't leave either, so Peter kept going.

"No _actually_ fighting crime. Bullets can hurt you, more than me anyways. Also, you can't stand up to crazy mutants on your own," Peter said. "But helping keep my cover is fine. And making sure I don't bleed out on the floor is also a-okay."

"So I'm your nursemaid?" Flash asked.

"Look, you want to help," Peter said. "I'm sorry it's not as glamorous as you thought or whatever."

"Not complaining. I just mean it seems lonely," Flash said. "Not having any allies out there when you're actually fighting."

Peter tilted his head to the side. "Didn't peg you as an emotional guy."

"Yeah, well you don't know everything about me," Flash said. "Even if you think you do."

"Aw, lighten up man." Peter nudged Flash's side, eyes narrowing when Flash winced and sucked in a tight breath. "Did-"

"Mind your own business."

"Hey, this is a two way street. You can help me, I help you. Is there something I can do?"

"Drop it."

Peter gave him a half-hearted glare and then looked straight ahead, jamming his hands into his jacket pockets. The tension between them was palpable, and Peter couldn't help but sneak the occasional look at him.

"So uh...you wanna come over? We're like halfway to my house anyways," Peter said.

"Can I finish going through that journal of yours?" Flash asked, some of the tension draining out of him.

"What is your obsession with that thing?" Peter asked.

"Dude, you've been face to face with the Vulture. And Electro. Why _wouldn't_ I want to read that?"

Peter rolled his eyes. "You're a total dork. That's your deep, dark secret isn't it?"

"If you tell anyone, I'll be forced to kill you." There was an easy grin on Flash's lips and Peter couldn't help but smile back.

"I like you better when you're not shoving me into lockers," Peter said.

"Yeah? I might have to a few times, just to keep appearances up," Flash said.

"Whoa, you serious? That is so not a part of the agreement."

"God, don't be a dumbass. I'm over that shit."

"Oh." Peter looked ahead again. "Cool."

 

-.-

 

Flash had just settled in to Peter's journal when his police scanner became active, reports of the Vulture's escape from jail pouring in. Flash wasn't even able to get a word in edgewise before Peter was jumping out his window and heading down the street. He leaned back in the computer chair and flipped Peter's journal open to the Vulture's page.

Next to the Vulture's name were three stars. Flash couldn't help but snort at Peter's rating system. It was like some sort of twisted video game, and Flash supposed it was one way to help himself through what he was doing. Honestly, he admired Peter, not like he'd actually tell the little dweeb that. He'd always keep _some_ appearances.

He closed the book and set it aside, unable to help his curiosity as he started looking through the papers on Peter's desk. Most of them were equations, scribbled out at the bottom with a 'scrap' scrawled across the top. Flash didn't spare much attention to those. What caught his eye were the blueprints of new suits. Alongside every one was a list of characteristics, and each list at one point or another had 'bullet-proof'. On each list, it was crossed out.

For some reason, that struck him harder than Peter's carefully organized list of enemies. Flash couldn't remember seeing any bullet wounds, but that didn't mean they weren't there. He saw desperation in the repeated word, the urge to have something protect him from the pain, and acceptance of the fact that the pain was inevitable and unavoidable in each strikethrough. It hurt, because Flash couldn't control who hurt him, who beat him. But Peter chose to go out every night and let himself get torn to shreds and shot at for some weird sense of justice.

Flash shoved the blueprints aside, not wanting to spend any more time on dark thoughts. With the papers out of the way, he'd revealed another journal, this one leather bound and tied off with string. Flash undid the string and opened it to the first page.

 

-.-

 

_Gwen said I should track how I'm feeling. Which okay, probably valid especially given how weird things are getting but I don't even know what to write._

           

-.-

 

_I don't tell Gwen but I'm scared now. I'm scared every time I go outside._

_-.-_

_Nightmares. Keeping seeing myself killing Gwen's dad._

-.-

 

_Beat the Vulture. Got him locked away and everything. There were some civilian casualties. No deaths though, which yeah, always a positive. I seriously need to think about what I write down in this thing. I don't really want to write what I'm feeling though. It'd all just depress me anyways._

-.-

 

_Bullets suck. I'm gonna be limping for days._

-.-

 

_Flash knows. That's terrifying. I don't want people to know. If they know, and other people find out, it's not me they're going to go after, it's them. I can't have anyone else's blood on my hands. People need to see I'm just trying to protect them._

-.-

 

As far as diaries went, it was hardly scandalous. Flash was pretty sure he'd find more incriminating words in Gwen's diary. Apparently, Peter wasn't even an emotional guy when he was only talking to his journal. Flash swallowed hard and then picked his phone up. He thumbed down to Gwen's name in the contact list, hesitating a moment before hitting the call button. Gwen picked up on the second ring, voice filled with confusion.

"Flash?"

"Hey, hi..."

"Are you with Peter?"

"He's out. I'm in his room. I guess the Vulture got out?"

He listened as Gwen shifted on her bed and listened as she fumbled with the remote.

"Well, it's all over the news. Peter looks like he's handling himself fine though," Gwen said. "So why are you calling me?"

"You vouched for me," Flash said. "You convinced Peter to give me a second chance. I wanted to know why."

"I know you can be a good person, Flash. I know Peter knows too, even if you have been a huge bully." Gwen took a deep breath and sighed before continuing in a quiet voice. "And between us, Peter _needs_ another shoulder to lean on. I do everything I can, but he needs more than one friend, Flash. I hope you can be that for him, but you're going to have to work for it."

"I know that." The guilt for his past actions was returning again, settling low in his gut.

"Can I ask you something?" Gwen asked.

"Uh, I guess."

"Are you helping Spider-man or Peter?"

The question felt like a punch to the stomach because in all honesty, Flash didn't know. It wasn't like he'd ever hated Peter. The kid had just been a soft body to take his pain out on; it wasn't personal. He'd help Spider-man in a heartbeat, because Spider-man was a hero. Peter though? Peter he wanted to help to make the aching hole of guilt in his chest go away.

"Hard to say. I'm not leaving now, though. I'm in this for however long," Flash said.

"Convince Peter then. It'll take awhile, but it's worth it. Peter's worth it."

"Is he worth your dad dying?" The words popped out without consulting his brain first.

"My dad made his own choice to help Peter. I can't blame anyone but Kurt Connors for what happened," Gwen said, but there was tremor in her voice that made Flash think she was lying. "Look, I need to go. You should be ready if Peter comes back. The Vulture is down but I think Peter took some damage."

She hung up before Flash could say anything in response. Flash dropped his phone on the desk and then got to his feet to open the bedroom door. He hadn't meant to upset Gwen, he was just horribly self-destructive when it came to relationships. He took after his father like that.

He located bandages, then filled a small bowl with hot water and grabbed a washcloth and soap. It felt rather routine, even if it was in a different house with actual bandages and not just the nearest clean cloth. The thoughts reminded him of the night before, his father's boot smashing down onto his ribs. Flash sucked in a deep breath and shook his head to clear it.

When he got back into Peter's room, the window was open and Peter was slumped against the wall. The mask lay on the floor and Peter offered a watery smile and a thumbs up.

"Heya," Peter said. "All we need now is a sexy nurse outfit for you."

"You must have me confused with Gwen," Flash said.

"You'd both look good."

"Jesus, did you get tossed into a wall or what?" Flash crouched beside him, mopping the blood off his forehead to reveal a shallow cut along his hairline.

"I'm pretty sure that yes, I most certainly did," Peter said.

"Where else are you hurt?" Flash asked. He unwrapped the bandages and began to patch up Peter's head.

"He got my back and leg. Do you know how to get blood out of the carpet?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, I'll take care of it." Flash tied off the bandage and helped Peter turn. The suit was shredded to all hell, and so were the bandages Peter must've replaced for his injuries from the night before. It took a joint effort to peel the thing off of him, which made the injuries look all the worse. His back was one mottled mass of bruises with three long, deep scratches cutting diagonally through it all, like the skin and muscle were no more than thin paper.

"How are you still conscious right now?" Flash asked. "Seriously, this is ridiculous, dude."

"Usually, I have to stay awake long enough to patch myself up. This is a luxury," Peter said.

Flash wiped the blood away, surprised at how Peter didn't so much as twitch. Peter remained silent as Flash cleaned and re-bandaged his injuries, old and new. The one from the other day was almost gone, and Flash was quick to clamp down on the irrational jealousy that brought him. He wondered briefly how many times Peter had taken care of the injuries Flash had dealt him before, all on his own. He was getting sick of all the obnoxious, traitorous thoughts.

"Okay, you're all set here. Want me to look at your leg?" Flash asked.

"Nah." Peter grabbed the corner of his bed and hauled himself to his feet. "Gonna change and do homework, let me know if anything interesting happens on the police scanner."

Flash waited until Peter was out of the room before he turned the police scanner off. The kid needed some relaxation time as far as Flash was concerned. He was starting to get the feeling that Peter was pretty shit at taking care of himself.

Flash cleaned the suit top in the kitchen sink, then hunted around in the basement for some hydrogen peroxide. He'd taken care of his fair share of bloodstains, so it'd be no problem with the right tools. By the time he got back up to Peter's room, Peter was huddled over his computer, towel around his neck with his hair still dripping wet.

"Sorry I ruined your hard bandaging work in the shower."

Flash glanced at Peter's back. "No big deal. They aren't bleeding anymore." He dropped the clean top on Peter's lap. "It's clean, but I can't sew to save my life so I guess that's on you." He set the hydrogen peroxide on the floor to deal with later.

Peter set the top aside and turned the chair around. He got up and shuffled towards the closet, shoving aside dirty clothes on the floor of it to reveal a bin. Flash raised his eyebrows when Peter opened it and pulled out another suit to toss on the bed for later.

"Someone's prepared," Flash said.

"Don't always got time to fix one. It was a super expensive investment but definitely worth it," Peter said. He shoved the bin back and turned to face Flash head on, arms folding across his chest. "Why'd you turn off the police scanner?"

"You need some down time," Flash said. "I know you want good grades or whatever so do school stuff or whatever."

Peter snorted. "Right. Okay. You _do_ realize there are people who could die if I'm not paying attention, right?"

"Dude, you're like sixteen. You don't have to put every god damn life on your shoulders," Flash said.

"I'm not-"

"You are still a shit liar, Parker. How have you gotten this far without blowing your cover?" Flash shook his head.

Peter's eyes narrowed, but he sat down at his desk and pulled his chemistry book out of his bag. "Fine. Didn't realize you were such a mother hen, Flash."

"Yeah, so not rising to the bait, nice try."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a couple more scenes I wanted to write but it would've made this chapter super long so it's gonna be three chapters instead! Enjoy!
> 
> Also side note I took tons of liberties with Flash's past so try not to hit me.

Flash slid into their lives with little fuss. He sat with Peter and Gwen at lunch despite the protest from his teammates. It was an odd show of loyalty Peter hadn't expected, but he wasn't about to tell Flash that. Peter learned to split his time between both Flash and Gwen and found he actually _enjoyed_ Flash's company.

The guy was really swell when he wasn't being a jerk

Peter landed on the roof of the police station, taking a deep breath. The city had been oddly calm as of late. Peter wanted to be grateful about it, but he couldn't shake the feeling that it was the calm before the storm. He wished his spidey senses could let him know when some crackpot scientist screwed up on an experiment and turned into some sort of raging creature. It would really save him a lot of time.

He swung off the building and headed towards the not so good side of the city. There were lots of those sides actually, but Peter made a point of staying out of Hell's Kitchen. Kingpin definitely wasn't someone he wanted to mess with on accident. It would be just his luck after all to take out a mugger the mob boss liked.

His spidey sense flared and he cut his web, letting himself drop to avoid the bullet. He swung towards the nearest building, tilting his head up when he heard another gunshot. It took a few quick seconds to locate the correct window and pop inside.

"Now, now, didn't anyone teach you not to-"

Peter's words dried up in his throat. There, on the ground of a grungy looking kitchen, was Flash, though Peter couldn't tell if he was unconscious or not. There wasn't any blood though, so Peter turned his attention back to Flash's dad, who was apparently the world's worst shot. His dad had a gun trained on Flash's head, which he then turned on Peter. His hand shook and Peter could smell the alcohol on him from two feet away. Slowly, Peter raised his hands in what he hoped would be taken as a pacifying gesture.

"Okay, man. You win. I don't mess with the guys with guns," Peter said. _At least not when someone else is at risk_."

"You fucking _super heroes_ , just think you can barge right on in anywhere, don't you?"

Peter eyed the wavering gun. "Nah, I'll leave. You can just go about your own business."

"Oh no, you're not going anywhere. Imma wipe your stupid mutant ass off the face of this Earth!"

"You just had to drag your mutantphobia into this, didn't you?"

Peter shot a web out, ducking into a forward roll to avoid a bullet. The next web snagged the gun away, sending it skittering across the ground. It was easy after that, a quick few punches and the man was out cold on the floor. Peter turned to face Flash, freezing when he saw that Flash had grabbed the gun and was pointing it at his dad.

"Flash, no. Put the gun down," Peter said.

Flash's face was bruised, his eyes swollen and red from tears. "Get the fuck out of my way. This isn't any of your business."

"You made it my business when you decided we should be friends," Peter said. "C'mon man. This isn't you."

"How would you know?" Flash's voice sounded raw. "I came f-from that bastard, s-so maybe this is m-me! You wouldn't know!"

Peter moved fast, pulling the gun out of Flash's hand and pushing him back against the stove. "You idiot! You said it yourself. You like Spider-man. And Spider-man doesn't kill, no matter what."

"I'm not a good person though. N-not like you," Flash said, staring down at Peter.

"Yeah you are. I know you are. So I'm going to tell you what we're going to do." Peter backed up to give Flash some space. "You're going to call the cops. I'm going to change into regular clothes before they get here. We're going to get your scumbag father locked up and then I'll take you to my place."

"I can't." Flash's voice cracked and his gaze dropped to the ground.

"Why not?"

"Because once he gets out, he'll just come after me again. I'm not an idiot," Flash said.

"Let him. I'll protect you."

Peter half expected Flash to react violently at the suggestion, but Flash just curled his arms around himself as he folded inward.

"Call the police, Flash. Please. I can't help you if you won't let me," Peter said.

A few tense moments passed and then Flash nodded. "Okay. Okay."

           

-.-

 

It was easy to convince Aunt May to let Flash in for an indefinite amount of time. She made them both a warm meal and put the blow up mattress in Peter's room. Peter wasn't sure how she managed to do it, but she was somehow able to offer a warm solidarity without being overbearing.

Peter wasn't really sure what to do with himself. As much as it hurt to lose his parents and uncle, it wasn't the same as what Flash had to go through. There were a lot of things Peter knew he could say, but he also knew they would only be heard as empty platitudes, so instead of saying anything, Peter just laid on his bed and stared Flash's curled and shaking form on the blow up mattress below.

"Flash?"

"What?" Flash's voice was rough.

"Can I...do something to help?"

"Haven't you helped enough?"

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Jesus." Flash turned onto his back to stare up at the ceiling. "How are you this naïve?"

"I was just trying to help. You _wanted_ to stay with your dad?" Peter reached over and flicked on the lamp. "Flash, just explain this to me, okay? I'm not a mind reader."

Flash was silent for a few long moments and Peter resisted the urge to try and make him talk before he was ready.

"I hate my dad. I've got scars from him." Flash still wasn't looking at him, a faraway look in his eyes. "But he's family. He's normal. How do I just...go on without him around?"

Peter eased off his bed and sat down next to Flash. "I don't know. I didn't mean to uproot your life, I swear, I just couldn't stand by and let that happen. He had a gun _pointed_ at your head."

"Yeah, I'm not fucking blind!" Flash rolled off the mattress and got to his feet, arm wrapping protectively around his ribcage. "But I know how to deal with him and his anger and his hate. But this? This emotional bullshit of talking out my feelings or whatever the fuck it is you're trying to do? This is what I don't know how to deal with. I don't know what to do because I don't know what the hell you want from me!"

"Flash, I don't want anything from you," Peter said, slowly getting to his feet. "We're friends now, for better or worse. I'm not helping you so that you'll owe me. I'm helping you because we're friends, and I care about you. Trust me, it's just as much a surprise to me as it is to you."

Flash's jaw was clenched tight, but there was a small tremor in his lower lip that made Peter's stomach feel like it was dropping out.

"I can't accept that," Flash said. "My entire life has been a series of exchanges. I preform well? Coach likes me. Win a game? School likes me. And as long as I don't screw up too bad, my dad likes me too. People don't care about you unless you have something to offer them."

Peter stepped over the mattress so he was toe to toe with Flash. "Well, you better get used to me caring about you because I don't want anything in return. You don't have any debt to repay with me Flash. You never will."

"I don't get you."

"Yeah, pretty much no one does. Why do you think I've only got like, two friends?" Peter smiled up at him. "You should sleep. You can take my bed."

"I-"

Peter flopped down onto the blow up mattress. "No arguments. You need sleep and my bed is probably the second comfiest one in the world."

"Second?" Flash eased himself down onto the bed, wincing as he did so.

"Well Tony Stark probably has the comfiest. I may be cocky, but I know when money has me beat."

"You're ridiculous."

 

-.-

 

Gwen leaned up against the locker next to Peter's and popped a piece of gum in her mouth. "Where's Flash at?"

"My house. Aunt May took the day off to meet with his lawyers and talk about the case with his dad. At least the guy doesn't remember that it was Spider-man that beat him up," Peter said as he searched through his locker for his chemistry homework. "I'd say more but people are gossipy. He's gonna be okay though."

"Should I come over today? Keep him company?" Gwen asked.

"Sure. I don't think he'd mind." Peter sighed and gave up searching before shutting his locker. "Gwen, he's pretty messed up and I don't know how to help." He pressed his forehead to the cool metal of his locker.

Gwen rubbed his back and then tugged him away from the locker. "We'll figure it out. I imagine he's not used to being this out of control of his life."

Peter linked their hands together. "Yeah, you're right. I just don't want to make it worse."

"You won't."

Peter smiled at her, wishing he had the same unshakable faith in himself that she did.

 

-.-

 

Peter climbed the stairs to his room, knocking once on the door before throwing it open. Flash was sitting on the floor with his chemistry book opened on the ground beside him and one of Peter's notebooks on his lap. He spared Peter a quick glance and then went back to tapping out some calculations on the calculator.

"This is weird. You and schoolwork I mean," Peter said, kicking the door shut.

"Again, not actually an idiot," Flash said.

"Just messing," Peter said. He tossed his bag aside and sat down next to Flash. "You know we could do that for you. Gwen and I hardly mind."

"Yeah well I gotta do something useful with my time," Flash said.

"You met with the lawyers today, right?" Peter asked.

"Yeah, you're aunt went with me," Flash said. "She's nice. Said she'd help pay any fees."

"You gonna let her?" Peter asked.

Flash sorted and finally looked over at Peter. "She didn't really give me a choice."

"She's like that," Peter said with a nod. "Gwen's coming over after work by the way. That cool with you?"

Flash gave an irritated sigh and set the homework aside. "Okay, I get it. You feel bad and you're trying to make me feel better by proving that you care. Feel free to stop at any time."

"I...I'm just trying to be a decent person. You live here now too, at least for a little while," Peter said. "God, why do you have to make this so difficult?"

He got to his feet and grabbed the police scanner, flicking it on. He listened intently as he shrugged out of his clothes to reveal the suit underneath before grabbing the mask off his desk.

"I'm going out for a bit. Did Aunt May take the night shift after she dropped you back off here?" Peter asked, opening the window.

"Yeah." Flash had turned back to the homework.

"Gwen will be by in an hour. Try not to be a jerk to her," Peter said.

Flash didn't say anything.

 

-.-

 

Flash had to let Gwen in when she showed up. It was so odd, being alone in a house that wasn't just a collection of decaying rooms strung together with broken plaster. He opened every door with a careful hand, painfully aware of how clean the place was. It was different now, because he was in debt to Aunt May and he couldn't stand the thought of upsetting her with a misplaced hand.

Gwen looked tired and rushed all at once, just as she always did. Her hair was falling out of her ponytail and there were a few stains on her shirt and pants from work. Despite it all though, there was a bright smile on her face and Flash didn't bother to stop a smile of his own in response.

"Is any of that mess gonna kill me?" he asked.

"Don't be ridiculous. I wouldn't let dangerous compounds out of the lab," Gwen said. She pushed passed him and kicked the door shut, the motion so similar to Peter's, Flash couldn't help but raise his eyebrows. "What?"

"You and Peter. You act the same. It's kinda creepy," Flash said.

Gwen rolled her eyes and then headed for the stairs. "Did Peter say how long he was going to be gone?"

"No. He's pretty pissed at me," Flash said as he followed after her. "Apparently I'm not that fun of a guy to help."

Gwen turned to face him at the top of the stairs. "He said that?"

"He said I was difficult."

"That's because you're like him," Gwen said. "Which I know, because I've tutored you enough the last two years. You are difficult to help, Flash. The same as him. Both of you are so crap at actually letting people help you. I swear, you both must have an inferiority complex."

"So I'm difficult but you still want to help?"

"Yep." Gwen beamed at him.

"But you guys don't actually care. You can't."

Gwen tilted her head to the side. "Flash, it's been months. We know you care about us, but if you can't believe we care for you, how are we supposed to take that?"

Flash stared up at her, the walls and the railings suddenly closing in on either side of him. He sucked in another deep breath, but it wasn't enough. Gwen raced down the steps and caught him before he fell, lowering them both to sit on the staircase. He clung to Gwen's legs and took in a few more deep breaths, but it did nothing to help the rush of blood in his head.

He was dimly aware of Gwen pulling him close and tucking his face into her neck. Her hand smoothed down his back and she kissed his temple and the touches seemed to jolt him back into his body as he took another deep and sobbing breath. There were tears soaking his cheeks and Gwen's neck, and his face felt flushed and red.

"You okay?" Gwen asked. Her shoulders shook with silent laughter. "Stupid question."

Flash wrapped his arms around her waist and closed his eyes. "I don't know what's wrong with me."

"We both sorta...were harping on you too much. We shouldn't have," Gwen said, running a hand through his hair. "That's the last thing you need right now."

"We're just kids," Flash said. "None of us know what the fuck we're doing."

"But you're the one hurting. So we'll take care of you." Gwen's hand slid up to squeeze the back of Flash's neck. "Your dad pulled a gun on you. You didn't deserve it. I don't know much else about your past but I _know_ no matter what he ever told you, you didn't deserve it. And you're allowed to take whatever time you need. Peter and I will still be here, even if Peter can be a bit impatient."

There were a million different words that came to Flash's mind, most along the lines of _I don't deserve you_ , but he only gave a muffled thank you instead. Gwen helped him to his feet and they headed up to Peter's room. Flash sat down on the edge of Peter's bed and watched as Gwen set her things down and then grabbed some of Peter's clothes from his closet.

"I'm going to shower. You want me to let Peter know what happened?" Gwen asked.

"You mean you don't actually tell each other everything?" Flash asked, only partially joking.

"You have your privacy. We all do," Gwen said. "If you want it to stay between us, then it does."

"Thanks. That'd be nice," Flash said.

Gwen gave a short nod. "No problem."

She vanished from the room and Flash eased back down onto the bed and tried not to make a sound when his ribs protested the action. It was ridiculous, he knew, being worried about showing weakness in front of Gwen; she put up with Peter's injured self more than Flash did. He couldn't help it though. No matter how bruised or bloody Peter got, he could still whine about it because he was freaking Spider-man. No one was about to revoke his man-card.

But Flash was just human. He'd spent years learning to keep his head up, his mouth shut, and to be a man no matter how much it all hurt. He wasn't allowed to be selfish, indulge, not without some sort of consequence.

He knew rationally that there weren't any consequences now. Despite that, and his lawyer's assurance that his dad was definitely going to jail, he couldn't shake the fear. He supposed that made him even weaker in Peter's and Gwen's eyes. Life had been so much easier before he had people that gave a damn about him. His mom had left long ago with his sister, so he'd never had to worry about his actions getting her hurt, or what she'd think of him.

Gwen came back in wearing one of Peter's shirts and his sweatpants with her own fishnet armbands still tucked up to her elbows. She sat down on Peter's computer chair and rolled over to the bed, squeezing the water out of her hair with a towel as she did so.

"How are you doing?" she asked, tapping his knee with her foot.

He rose up onto his elbows to look at her. "I'm trying to not lie so...not good."

Gwen's smile was a little sad. "Well, not lying is good."

"Is Aunt May seriously okay with this?" Flash asked.

"With what?"

"You just, you know, making yourself at home even though she's not here," Flash said.

"Her nephew is Spider-man. We're hardly her biggest concern," Gwen said.

"Wait, what? She _knows_?" Flash asked. "Peter acts like he's trying to hide it."

"After my father..." Gwen ducked her head and she crumpled the towel in her lap. "He decided it would be better if he didn't keep any more secrets from her."

"She just lets him risk his life like that?" Flash asked.

"I mean, you and I let him too," Gwen said. "Peter is doing something good. Who are we to get in the way of that?"

"He's lucky to have you guys."

"You have us too, Flash."

The door downstairs opened before Flash could say something stupid in response. Gwen got to her feet and held her hands out for Flash to take. He let her help him to his feet, surprised when Gwen's arms wrapped around him in a gentle hug. Flash hesitated a moment and then hugged her back. There was something safe about Gwen, something unshakable in her presence where as Peter was nothing but a constant moving shape, hard to attach himself to in a time he needed something stable.

"You're going to be okay Flash. I promise."

 

-.-

 

Gwen stayed for a while after dinner, curling into Flash's side on the couch as they watched television. Peter didn't seem at all bothered by it and kissed her on her way out. Aunt May headed upstairs soon after Gwen left, hugging Flash and Peter before she did so.

Flash glanced across the room to where Peter sat in his chair with his homework. There were dark circles under his eyes and Flash watched as he struggled to stay awake, the slow blinks growing longer and longer until he just didn't open his eyes again. Flash sighed and stood up. He turned off the television and then walked over to Peter's chair to give him a rough shake.

Peter jerked awake, pulling his punch at the last second. "Ah, sorry. Are we sleeping now?"

"You need to be," Flash said. "Homework can wait. I got your back on this one. For once."

"Words I never thought I'd hear." Peter tossed his books on the floor and got to his feet, wincing and dropping an arm to brace over his stomach.

"Are you hurt?" Flash asked.

"Nothing too bad," Peter said, waving him away.

Flash wrapped an arm around Peter's waist and let him lean up against him. His ribs protested the action but he pushed it away.

"Broken helping the broken. Aren't we a pair?" Peter asked.

"Eh, I've seen worse," Flash said.

It took a bit more effort than usual to get up the stairs, and he got the feeling Peter had taken more damage than he was letting on.

"You gonna go to school tomorrow?" Peter asked once they were finally settled in on their respective beds.

Flash turned off the lamp and stretched out on the air mattress. "I guess. Has anyone heard about what happened yet?"

"No, but they might know tomorrow. I swung by the Daily Bugle and your dad's arrest is mentioned," Peter said. "Depends on if they pay attention I guess. It's not...too bad. The stares, I mean. Everyone knew about my uncle when he died but..."

Flash could almost hear the shrug in the way Peter's voice dropped off.

"I never did thank you for what you did then," Peter continued, voice softer. "Everyone else just stared and stayed away but you weren't afraid of me. You never treated me like I was gonna break."

"Might be because I was too busy beating the shit out of you," Flash said.

Peter snorted. "We're passed that. Take the stupid thank you."

"You're welcome," Flash said.

"I gotta apologize too," Peter said.

"For what?" Flash asked.

"Being an ass," Peter said. "It isn't your job to be easy to help. I just lost my patience and you didn't deserve that. So uh yeah, I'm sorry. About that."

Flash frowned. "Yeah, no problem. It's fine."

           

-.-

 

When Flash woke, it was with a scream half way out of his throat and the phantom grip of his father's hand at the back of his neck. His breath escaped him in harsh, ragged pants and he rolled onto the floor, twisting his fingers in the threads of the carpet. It took him a long few moments to realize Peter was crouched beside him. He was careful not to crowd Flash too much, for which Flash was grateful. The way his skin felt, like every nerve was a heartbeat away from exploding, he wasn't sure he could handle much of anything.

"You gonna be okay?" Peter's voice was lower than usual, rough from sleep.

Flash gave an uneasy, pained laugh. "No. Don't think I ever will be."

"Can I hug you now?"

Flash rolled onto his side, surprised at how small Peter looked. He wondered if Peter was purposely trying to look unintimidating. He wouldn't put it passed him.

"Why would you want to do that?"

"You won't stop shaking and I know it's not because you're cold."

Flash closed his eyes and focused on the way the carpet scratched his cheek. "It's not because I'm scared."

"Yeah, you are," Peter said. "It's not a bad thing. I'm scared all the time. Sometimes I shake so hard I feel like my bones are going to rattle out of my skin."

Flash opened his eyes, the words from Peter's journal echoing in his brain. "How do you make it stop?"

"Remind myself I'm not alone," Peter said. "You're not less of a man for being scared and needing someone to help you. I promise."

"Of course _you_ can say that," Flash said, pushing himself upright on shaking arms.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Peter asked. He stood up and then reached down to help Flash to his feet.

"You're Spider-man. You don't have to worry about being weak."

"You aren't weak."

Peter tugged him forward in a tight hug, hooking his jaw over Flash's shoulder. Flash slumped forward, wrapping his arms around Peter's smaller form and clinging. Sure, Peter _was_ smaller, but it was comforting to know he could lean on Peter as hard as he wanted without fear of knocking him over.

"We can share my bed," Peter said.

Flash nodded into Peter's shoulder, too tired to pretend that wasn't exactly what he wanted. Peter stretched out first and then pulled Flash snug up against his back.

"You can be the big spoon, Mr. Manly Man."

Flash snorted and buried his face in the back of Peter's neck. Their legs twined together in a haphazard tangle as Peter pulled the covers up over them both. Flash held Peter as tight as he could, the act of using all his strength to keep him close and keep him down actually making Flash feel like he was in control. The tremors died down with each passing moment until Flash's arm was slung loosely over Peter's waist. Peter didn't pull away though and Flash fell asleep with Peter's hair tickling his jaw.

 

-.-

 

Of course, it would be too easy if Flash's mind let him sleep the rest of the night through. The next time he woke, fear and adrenaline pumped through him so hard he didn't stop fighting until Peter had him pinned for a long minute. Flash stared up at him, his image blurred by the tears still swelling and spilling over from Flash's eyes.

"Let go," Flash said, voice cracking.

"You sure?" Peter asked.

Flash gave a short nod and Peter loosened his grip before crawling off of him and turning on the bedside lamp. Flash sat up, still panting, and leaned back against the wall. Peter shuffled across the bed and sat down next to him, shoulders pressed together.

"You should make me leave," Flash said, staring down at his hands as he twisted them together. "You need sleep. You got important super hero shit to do and I'm just getting in the way."

"No you're not."

"I'm broken, dumbass. There's nothing left over for you to fix so stop freaking trying you-"

Peter leaned across him and pressed their lips together. Flash's eyes widened, jaw going slack as Peter snuck his way between Flash's legs to press closer and grab the back of Flash's neck. After a beat of hesitation, Flash closed his eyes and slid his own hand up to Peter's shoulder. He wasn't quite sure where it was coming from, but he was too tired and too desperate for some sort of sign that he was cared for to want to push Peter away.

When Peter did pull back, Flash found himself distracted by the way Peter's lower lip was a bit swollen from where Flash had sucked on it. It made him feel a bit giddy that he had left that mark, and he was struck by a sudden urge to leave more, leave proof of his existence everywhere, burrow his way in so he could never be left behind.

"You aren't punching me. Gotta admit, I'm surprised," Peter said, sitting back on his heels.

"Why'd you do it?"

"I was trying to get you to shut up," Peter said.

"Isn't Gwen gonna kill both of us?" Flash asked.

"Nah, I'll talk to her tomorrow," Peter said. "So I uh...don't care that you're broken, Flash. You're my friend and I'm not leaving."

 "Pretty sure friends don't do what we just did," Flash said with a cocky grin.

Peter rolled his eyes and tugged Flash away from the wall. "Lay down and go back to sleep. We still got two hours before my alarm goes off."

Flash obeyed and watched as Peter turned off the lamp. He stretched out on his side, relaxing back into Peter when the other pressed up against his back. Perhaps being the small spoon wasn't so bad.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter has a run in with some Doom-bots and Flash realizes love actually isn't impossible to achieve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo finished it! My first Flash/Peter is done! I hope you guys like the last chapter. Sorry it took so long to get out. I really enjoyed writing this so maybe I'll write more of this pairing in the future. Comments are always loved. Thanks for reading.

Peter sat down next to Gwen, leg tapping out an uneven rhythm on the ground. He had roughly two minutes before Flash would get through the lunch line, if his estimation was correct.

"Peter, what is it?" Gwen asked.

"I kissed Flash last night!" The words squeaked out of Peter's throat and he squeezed his eyes shut, shoulders hunching forward.

"Yeah, okay? And?"

Peter opened one eye, watching as Gwen popped a fry in her mouth and raised an eyebrow. "You...don't wanna yell and scream at me?"

"I've seen this coming for the last like, month," Gwen said. "You two are so blind, I swear. I'm not bothered by it."

Peter slumped forward and leaned his chin on his hand as he looked at her. "So are you saying you're okay if we...keep doing it?"

"Doing what?"

"The kissing thing," Peter said, a flush creeping up his neck. "You knew what I meant, you just wanted to hear me say it!"

"That is definitely correct," Gwen said with a grin. "No, seriously, I'm okay with whatever you two have. Just as long as you're mine too and you two don't hide anything from me. That's what I won't stand for."

"You're the best girlfriend ever and I love you," Peter said.

He straightened and slid his hands to cup her jaw and pull her into a deep kiss, murmuring out a few more muffled praises as he did so. Gwen laughed and pulled away, smacking his arm.

"Peter, you're ridiculous," Gwen said.

"So what'd I miss?" Flash asked, sitting in his usual seat across from them and hunching forward over his lunch tray.

Peter extended a leg, knocking their knees together. "Just catching Gwen up on you and me. She's uh...cool with whatever."

"And I'm not just saying it because you're going through a rough time Flash. You two are good for each other. And I'm good for you both," Gwen said with a shrug. "So. Whatever makes you guys happy makes me happy."

"Peter, you have the best girlfriend ever," Flash said.

"That's what I'm saying!"

 

-.-

 

When they got back from school, Aunt May was sitting at the dinner table with a lawyer type guy. Both Peter and Flash hovered awkwardly in the archway.

"I thought we were meeting with the lawyers again this weekend," Flash said.

Peter pressed a hand to his lower back, stopping Flash from backing away.

"We are, this isn't related to that," Aunt May said. "Peter, could you maybe go upstairs?"

Peter glanced at Flash, who was stubbornly staring at the floor. "Uh, yeah. Sure."

He moved away from Flash and headed up the stairs, trying to ignore the odd twist in his gut. He sat down at his computer desk and pulled out one of the broken web-shooters he had gathering in one of the drawers. His leg beat out a jack-hammer rhythm against the ground as he started to pull the web-shooter apart so he could fix it up. He tried to ignore the muffled sounds of talking. Whatever it was, it obviously wasn't any of his business.

Except it _totally_ was his business because anything that added stress to Flash's life added stress to his own, and Flash really didn't need more to worry about and think about. Peter winced when he accidentally stabbed the web-shooter through with his screwdriver. He tossed the web-shooter in the trash and let his head thunk down against the desk.

Flash knocked on Peter's door before stepping in. Peter popped back upright, sliding passed Flash and shutting the door.

"What happened, what'd she say?" Peter asked.

"Calm down, bug boy. She was offering to become my legal guardian," Flash said. "So I don't get put in the system."

"Oh. Dude, that's awesome!" Peter said.

Flash seemed surprised at Peter's enthusiasm. "Are you sure? I mean...I'd be living here for like two more years."

"Nah, I'd rather you get shuffled around from home to home and potentially never see you again," Peter said, raising an eyebrow. "Of course I'm okay with it."

Flash's smile was hesitant still. "Okay, cool."

Peter grabbed the back of Flash's neck and tugged him down for a kiss, simply because he was relieved and because he could. Flash gave a muffled sound of surprise, but then his hands fell to Peter's hips to tug him closer. Kissing Flash was nothing like kissing Gwen. Gwen was all tongue and teeth and small tricks that drove Peter insane. Flash was tentative though, like he wasn't sure what to do, what he _could_ do.

He let Flash push him back against the wall, a short hiss escaping passed his lips. Flash grew more confident in his actions, hands sliding beneath Peter's shirt before suddenly stopping. He started to laugh against Peter's lips, then let his head drop into the crook of Peter's neck, shoulders shaking from laughter.

"What?" Peter asked, arms dropping to loop around Flash's back.

"Your friggen suit," Flash said, rubbing his thumbs over the ridged fabric of the Spider-man suit. "I don't know, just made me laugh. My dad's going to jail, your aunt's basically adopting me, and I'm making out with Spider-man. How is this even my life?"

Peter snorted. "You're ridiculous."

Flash pulled back and then raised a hand up to swipe a thumb over Peter's lips. Peter nipped at it, grinning at the flush that spread up Flash's neck at the action.

"You going out tonight?" Flash asked.

"Just for a few hours," Peter said. "Aunt May's gonna want me to help clean out the attic so you can have your own room."

"But I like sharing with you," Flash said, crowding closer and dropping his lips to Peter's neck.

"Hey, no, I got things to do," Peter whined, ducking out of Flash's grip. "Later, we'll celebrate later."

Flash's smile faded and Peter frowned, tilting his head to the side.

"What is it?" Peter asked.

"I just...you know I'm not going to be like instantly better or anything, right?"

"If you mean the nightmares, yeah, dude, I know. Doesn't mean we can't be excited about the good news when we get it," Peter said with a shrug.

"Point taken," Flash said. "Go do your thing. Save the world and be awesome."

Peter pulled off his shirt and kicked his pants off before grabbing his mask. "Will do."

 

-.-

 

Of course, Dr. Doom chose that night to unleash his new Doom-bot prototypes, meaning that Peter got to dodge laser beams and police officers' bullets for several long hours. Peter kept hoping that one day the police officers would get the point that he was trying to help them, but perhaps that was too optimistic. He was also pretty sure that Avengers should've started paying him because they took way too long to scramble, leaving Peter without back up of any kind.

Oh, sweet, wishful thinking.

When Peter got back, it was late. All the attention and mayhem made it so he had to be more careful sneaking back in. He fell into his room with a thud and muffled cry of pain. Flash knelt beside him after shutting the window tugging the blinds down.

"Jesus Peter, how many times did you get hit?" Flash asked, helping him out of the suit as best he could. "Aren't your spidey senses supposed to help with this dodging thing?"

"When hundreds of Doom-bots are shooting lots of lasers at you, it becomes a bit difficult. How bad is it?"

"You can't tell?"

There was a slight note of hysteria in Flash's voice, which Peter assumed meant it was pretty bad.

"Not really. Everything's all float-y and stuff," Peter said.

"I need to get your aunt, Peter," Flash said. "This is beyond my abilities."

"Shit. Okay," Peter said. "She's going to be so pissed."

"She'll be more pissed if you end up dead," Flash said, getting to his feet. "I'll be right back. Don't you dare pass out."

"Roger that, Flash-y."

"Oh my God..."

Peter rested his head back against the windowsill, letting his eyes close. Barely a minute passed before his door slammed open and Aunt May was crouching beside him. He opened his eyes back up, trying not to panic at the alarm in Aunt May's eyes. A moment passed and then she clenched her jaw tight and began to clean the burns and cuts.

"Flash, sterilize that needle and thread it. Peter, I'm going to have to sew this shut but I have nothing to numb you with."

"'S okay," Peter said. "Had worse."

She frowned and set the washcloth aside. Flash shoved a rubber mouth guard in his mouth and Aunt May began.

 

-.-

 

Flash ran a hand through Peter's hair and then smoothed out the lines of pain and worry on his face with his fingers. Peter curled into Flash and then lay still once more.

Flash still felt like his heart was in his throat. Despite everything, he didn't have Aunt May's nerves of steel and all he could see in his mind's eye was Peter's blood covering his hands. He'd asked Aunt May, when they'd finished patching Peter up and getting him to bed, how she did it. She'd handed him a cup of hot chocolate and simply said,

"It's love, Flash. I think about how much I love him and it makes just about anything possible."

He couldn't help but think about how the panic had been all encompassing, and it had left him feeling out of control. He supposed Peter really had been the only person capable of pulling him back from that edge. It certainly wasn't love, Flash was still trying to convince himself actual love was possible, but what they had couldn't just be affection either.

Peter jerked in Flash's grip, jolting into full awareness all at once. He gave a pained and wet gasp as his fists curled in the fabric of Flash's shirt.

"How bad is the pain?" Flash asked.

"Bad!" Peter's voice was little more than a pained squeak.

"Okay, lay back. Your aunt left a crap ton of meds for you to take. She said she's pretty sure it's enough to help," Flash said.

"Worth a shot," Peter said.  

Flash slid off the bed and handed Peter the glass of water and bottle of Aspirin. Peter's pain read easily in his face as he swallowed down a handful of pills.

"I don't get why you do this," Flash said.

"Responsibility. I can fight, so I gotta," Peter said. He eased back down onto the bed and shut his eyes. "You gonna stay over there?"

Flash snorted and then squeezed in beside Peter. Peter rolled into him and as Flash turned off the lamp and let his arm drape loosely over Peter's shoulders, he was struck by how small and breakable the kid was. He buried his nose in Peter's hair and told himself that Peter was safe until he fell asleep.

 

-.-

 

The next few days. Peter stayed at home. Between Gwen and Flash, he didn't come close to falling behind on his schoolwork, but by the fourth day, Flash could tell he was getting restless.

Flash clicked off the police scanner as he walked into Peter's room, holding it out of reach when Peter tried to snatch it back from him.

"I don't know why you listen. It's not like you can do anything about it right now anyways," Flash said.

Peter groaned and leaned back in his computer chair. "Aunt May won't even let me clean out the attic though! Do you know how boring life is now?"

"What'd you do before you became a super hero? I'm sure you had lots of lame nerdy things to do," Flash said with a teasing smile.

Peter kicked weakly at him. "Not just that. I had a life! But it all requires more movement than I'm capable of."

"Says the guy who wants to lift heavy boxes in the attic," Flash said. He tossed his bag on the ground and hopped up on Peter's desk, bracketing the chair Peter was in with his legs. "Aunt May got a late shift?"

Peter slid the chair closer and rested his hands on Flash's thighs. "Yup. So I mean, if you're interested in that celebration of being permanent roomies..."

Flash raised an eyebrow. "You're still healing."

"Don't need to be completely healed for a little hanky panky," Peter said, waggling his eyebrows.

"You're crazy," Flash said as he leaned down.

"Yeah, I'm crazy?" Peter asked, a short laugh escaping him as Flash pressed their lips together.

"Yeah, totally," Flash muttered against his lips.

Peter's hand was a heavy weight on the back of Flash's neck, and it sent a bolt of fear down his back. He shuddered and pulled away to just rest his head against Peter's forehead. Peter's thumb rubbed against his hairline, the action so kind and gentle that it chased away the sudden phantom reminder of his father. Flash leaned back in, pressing their lips together in a warm, and wet kiss as he sucked a tight breath in through his nose.

Peter met his enthusiasm eagerly, hands wrapping around Flash's wrist when Flash dropped his hands to cradle Peter's jaw. Flash slid his tongue in deep and then gave a muffled groan when Peter sucked at it. Soon, Peter was pushing him back until their kiss broke and Flash put his hands against the edge of the desk, gripping tight as Peter rolled the chair back and tugged at Flash's sweats.

It was a joint effort, fighting them off and onto the floor, and Flash suddenly felt like he couldn't breath as Peter leaned down and pressed his mouth to the fabric of Flash's boxers.

"P-Peter," Flash stammered out.

Peter looked up, hands rubbing beneath Flash's shirt across the flesh of his hips. "Want me to stop?"

The question sent vibrations against Flash's cock and he whined, trying to fight the urge to fist his hands in Peter's hair.

"Just don't uh, want you do anything you don't want," Flash finally managed to say.

Peter rolled his eyes and went back to work, following the line of Flash's hardening cock with his tongue. Flash groaned and then helped Peter take his shirt off when the other began to push it up. Peter spent more time sucking at Flash through his boxers than was strictly necessary, but Flash found that he almost preferred it. It was a slow burn, a gorgeous tease that had him gasping and twitching, and it was slow enough to keep him calm.

It wasn't like he wasn't totally on board with what was happening; he was. It was just that it was all still new to him too, and new to Peter unless the kid had a double life to his double life that he wasn't telling Flash and Gwen about. Flash jolted out of his thoughts when Peter eased him out of his boxers, gasping out Peter's name as the warm hand wrapped around him.

"Flash, f-fuck you sound amazing," Peter said, the words a hushed whisper.

Flash stared down at him, jaw slack. Hearing Peter's voice tremble and crack over the word broke something in his chest because _he_ made Peter say it. He'd made Peter say a word he never thought the kid would say and _Jesus Christ_ -

"Fuck Peter, fuck," Flash panted out, grabbing at Peter's hair.

Peter turned his head to nip at Flash's finger before taking one into his mouth and sucking it down to the last knuckle. Flash groaned at the sight, somehow finding it more intense to see that instead of Peter's lips around his dick. He reached down and began to stroke his cock with his free hand as Peter continued to lick up and down his finger before taking in the second finger as well.

"Peter, can't..." Flash closed his eyes, not sure if he could handle seeing Peter's flushed cheeks a moment longer.

Peter popped off of his fingers and the sound made Flash's breath catch. "Go ahead, please, Flash..."

"Shit-!"

One more stroke and Flash's hips jerked as Peter nipped at his finger once more. Flash managed to choke out half of Peter's name as he came, the rest of the pleasure coursing through his body so strong he couldn't say anymore. When he opened his eyes again, Peter was wiping cum off his cheeks and licking his lips with a smug grin on his face.

"Good?"

"Yeah, more than good," Flash said. "Where'd you...learn to do that..."

"That was my first time," Peter said, tucking Flash back in his pants and rubbing his hands along Flash's thighs.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Peter said.

He eased carefully into a standing position and leaned into Flash's warmth. Flash wrapped his arms around him and rested his face in the crook of Peter's neck as he tried to catch his breath. Peter squeezed the back of his neck.

"Good celebration," Flash said, words ending in a laugh after a moment.        

Peter snorted and pulled back so he could place a quick kiss on Flash's lips. "I know Aunt May baked you a cake to celebrate the whole you being adopted thing."

"Does that mean my brother just blew me?" Flash asked.

"Oh my God, you're gross," Peter said with a laugh. "But I think we're a bit closer than that..."

"Yeah?"

Peter ducked his head as he pressed his head to Flash's forehead. "I love you, Flash."

Flash sucked in a deep breath and pushed his lips to Peter's in a hard, desperate kiss. The words echoed and bounced around in his head as he cupped Peter's face in his hands once more. Peter hummed, content as he leaned into Flash's warm weight.

"Love you too," Flash murmured as he pulled away, lips still pressed to Peter's. "Jesus, I love you Peter Parker."

He could barely handle the way the words filled up his chest, the way the feeling overwhelmed him and made him want to crawl inside Peter, wrap himself up in the other's warmth and never let go. Flash kissed Peter until they were both breathless, then guided them back onto Peter's bed so they could kiss some more. Peter didn't seem to mind.

 

-.-

 

Later that night, Aunt May, Gwen, Peter, and Flash celebrated Flash's official status of having Aunt May as his legal guardian. They ate until they were full and watched television until Gwen had fallen asleep on Peter's lap and Aunt May retired to her room, but only after dropping a kiss on Flash's forehead.

When she was gone, Flash joined the other two on the couch. Gwen shifted, blinking slowly and then smiling up at Flash as he settled in. She pushed herself up enough to kiss his chin and then sprawled across their laps once more. Flash settled and arm over Peter's shoulder.

It wasn't perfect, but it was better than where he'd started. He was going to be okay. They all were.


End file.
